Many years ago, I promised my dad that I would do everything I could to keep him out of a care home. When he got sick 15 years ago, that promise was put to the test. And even more so in the last couple of months.
Somehow, after all these years, we’ve managed to keep him at home with us. I haven’t talked much about how things have changed over these 15 years, especially in the last 6 months.
My dad went from a man who used to drive a semi-truck across the country for weeks at a time to someone who now needs help just getting gas. He used to always have coffee brewing, but now most days he doesn’t even remember how to make a pot of coffee.
He was always the cook, but now he can’t touch the stove unless someone is watching him closely. He used to pass every physical exam easily, but now he can’t walk 30 feet without stumbling or falling. He used to drive us everywhere, but he hasn’t been behind the wheel in years.
He taught me how to clean the trucks and take care of the chrome, but now he doesn’t even know how to wash a plate. He used to take care of the lawn, but now he can’t even push a lawnmower or hold a weed eater. I’m thankful he taught me all those things when I was growing up.
When I was younger, I had dreams about how I wanted my life to be when I had kids, and how excited I was for my dad to teach his grandkids all the things. But now, my reality is very different from what I imagined.
This is my reality now. Feeding him, picking him up after he falls, helping him shower, shaving him, and making his coffee—this is my life now.